So yeah a summary of the last episodes of these whining shitheads; What these dumbasses did was unite left-leaning, center and right-leaning individuals around the world by going after what they deemed "illegal" games in the name of 'stopping child abuse'.
And time and time again they've been called out as absolute frauds.
After having kicked the global hornets' nest of gamers and getting clowned on for three weeks since, you'd think these morons would have the brain cells to figure out 'this isn't working, maybe we should be fighting for the rights of real women and children who are exploited'. But sadly, as spoiled brats awash in dirty money, getting responded with a global
...just made them angrier. Too bad they can't come up with any new tactics aside from screaming to the United (of the 'peacekeepers running rape rings' fame) Nations.
As if that gives them any kind of credibility.
Just like Jack Thompson and those lumps of lard at Feminist Frequency - can't for the life of them come up with proper arguments, so they go running to the authorities. I swear there must be some kind of 10-year cycle with these creeps trying to police the world.
Yeap, as anticipated - they're doubling down, and as I predicted, this was NEVER about porn games. It's ALL about running a global nanny state. They weren't just satisfied with getting to dictate how things are run in the good ol' Land Down Under, now they want to dictate what people can play. Losers trying to helicopter parent because their children either said 'fuck this shit I'm out.mp3' or they just want more people to donate to their luxurious lifestyles.
HEY, TURDBRAINS, WHY NOT ARREST SWEATSHOP BUSINESS OWNERS, OR SHUT DOWN DIRTY MINING OPERATIONS? Oh no, can't have their shitty 'luxury fashion' or shiny jewelry production stopped, oh no. They HAVE to go after gamers because they saw an easy target to extort from, and payment processors willing to self-sabotage in order to 'appear virtuous' in front of a supposed "feminist group" with more dirty laundry than a 1910s washhouse.
As if the whole cuties debacle wasn't damning enough, now these lard buckets are caught in another scam. The ol' corrupt government favorite - "create a problem, sell a solution, buy it or else [BAD]!" scam!
It's like some kind of "LAWS OF MEMETAPHYSICS" - all these people running their morality crusades always turn out to be horrible people in real life. RULES OF NATURE!
Damn shame these idiots' actions have real life consequences. It was funny when they were restricted to tumblr with no real power, but now they're being a problem for everyone.
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Next up, news from woke north korea. Apparently the british Politburo is confident enough in their censorship to simply ignore petitions rather than having to discuss them in parliament. So much for 'democracy' when a bunch of tech-illiterate geriatrics get to dictate things, right?
No seriously, look at this mess they came up with for 'moderation'. It's clear they have no idea how computers even work, let alone what goes in the background of many online communities.
Of course, tin-pot tyrants in third-world countries often have an inflated sense of ego, and the same appears to be true for OFCOM.
Look, I know the british government's teetering towards a bankruptcy bad enough to cut funding to their seniors, but extorting money from Americans? Last time some morons did that, they turned what was an ex-british colony into a global industrial behemoth and resulted in a bloody hole getting blasted open in a 400-year old empire of thieves and slavers. Too bad these dolts don't even know basic history.
And just like how Collective Shart's campaign was never about 'protecting women and children', looks like the "Online Safety Act" was never about 'safety' either. Just look at this absolute mess!.
I'm certainly sure the american version (kOSA) isn't about helping keep children safe either.
Shoutout to all the british friends - hope you've found another way through because if the government goes full Beijing firewall, I'm gonna miss yakking with you fellas.
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So yeah, real life stuff... I have a bit of a work-related trip happening this monday. Probably means no internets since I don't know how to spool a length of fiber optic wiring to another country... this job feels like Pokemon Mystery Dungeon - going into an unexplored (in my POV) place to rescue a subsidiary team from financial ruin.
Well, see you all in five or so days.
PS: If I die, please place the ashes of my remains on the Summoning Circle and say the magic word "pingas". Or was it "WIIIIISE FWOM YOUR GWAVE!"...?
I was gonna post these in this thread but it's locked for some reason. Awright, here goes...
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"It's just gooner games, why do you care?" they said. "You're defending porn!", "It’s just about stopping kids from looking at violent porn! If you oppose this, you hate children!"
Jokes on them, I bet that the slippery slope fallacy was a lie and that it's an oiled-up cliff rather than a slope. I won big. The naysayers kept claiming that I was "screeching against usual imagined strawmen", but I'm glad I'm the sort to laugh at those wannabe regulators and continued documenting the overreach of governments and payment processors when it comes to legal content being blocked.
And just as I had expected, for the last few days - the 'payment processor guidelines' continued to expand, even spreading to non-sexual content such as horror games, I shit you not.
What next on their shit list? Cawadoody? GTA? Or is it a concerted effort to hyperregulate out the indie gaming industry because the big-name megacorps are stuck hawking overpriced garbage that would get blammed for sure on the newgrounds portal?
I wasn't exaggerating when I said "the real war begins now" last year.
These supposed 'payment processors' have a LOT of perfectly legal things on their shitlist. It's not just 'incest/rape games' as their activists will often claim, but things like dating services for anime fans...
Funny how they brag about judging what's illegal or not, claim to have a 'brand to protect'... when these same dumbasses are caught with this kind of baggage.
Wew.
Note the response used by Visa HQ - which comically breaks the latest boilerplate response they had to initiatives like yellat.money and other citizen responses.
First, they declare themselves the 'arbiters of morality' and pressure sites to comply or else. Then they claim that they don't moderate anything.
As you can guess, no one bought that lie.
In fact, the backlash against itch.io for their disrespect to the community's so great that they've started to slowly backpedal. Re-indexing itch.io nsfw items is a start - but to be 're-indexed', payments have to be switched off.
He's even switched off replies because he probably knows just how bad things have gotten huehuehue. "Salute" emote right back at ya. Should have thought of that before throwing your userbase under the bus.
Me? I will not trust them again. Hell, I've already cut visa and paypal off completely out of my financial system well ahead of time, and I'll take things two steps further now that I've seen that these so-called payment processors are willing to go after legal content.
You know what, have a look at this too. Oh and there's a list of numbers right here.
Sure, visa reps might call you a rapist...
...but even if they scream at you, what you do is ask them politely, yet firmly to leave their hands off your right to purchase legal goods (Hank Hill voice). Do not lose your cool, do not yell at them. Do not threaten them (this is illegal, you know). Explain that if visa and mastercard keeps changing the rules and engaging in theft, you cannot continue being their customer.
So, what's the latest word on Collective Shart?
This reminds me of that one time some overbearing mop-brain proudly admitted that they ran an extortion racket targeting small games studios.
So I gotta say this: "HOW MANY TIMES DO WE HAVE TO TEACH YOU THIS LESSON, OLD MAN!?"
So, on top of everything else done so far, I've decided to make another quick Sex Kitten game: NUKE'EM!
The story is simple: "Slutty McSlut's favourite cooking show has been demonetized by Wuss-a because Collective Shart says a show where anime catgirls cook horrifyingly eldritch and spicy dishes is 'my soggy knees' or something! To calm her down, you take some enriched uranium from the garage, tell her to buy a plane ticket to Australia and drive to the Mall to buy the rest of the nukuler warhead components!"
"... you forgot your wallet at home and it's too much of a drive back home. So to save on time, gas and avoiding the possibility of admitting the fact you forgot your wallet to Slutty McSlut, you decide to do things the classic way..."
Also, I've got something else in the works, but I'll be dropping that later because what I have now is just one test html page lol.
PS: Personally, I think the whole concept of 'gooner' is pushed by snot-nosed manchildren on a power trip, seeking to police others to compensate for just how little control they have over their own lives because they stupidly put all their personal details on failbook, poopstagram or tocktik or something.
PUT YOUR WALLET DOWN YOU DON'T NEED TO SIGN UP FOR SOME SKEEVY ASS "ACADEMY", THIS KNOWLEDGE SHOULD BE FREE.
Alright, so I checked in with the Big Boss Tom Fulp due to recent events and got his okay for this, so I'll be teaching you how to get into bitcoin. No, you're not buying anything, and no, you're not getting over 9000 Bugatti's. All you're getting is a public tip jar that anyone can review and see exactly what you're earning and spending on.
That's right. Bitcoin's blockchain (the record of transactions) is public for anyone to peruse and review. Personally, I think it's great for charities and such because it makes stealing donations a whole lot harder because of the digital paper trail that everyone has access to.
THE BASICS.
So, first things first, you're g-PUT THAT STACK OF GPUS BACK WHERE YA FOUND 'EM, WE'RE NOT BUYING ANYTHING LIKE THAT EITHER. Yeap, you can use bitcoin WITHOUT causing problems in the supply of graphics cards AND without getting an electricity bill that'll make you go HNNNNNNNNNNNGHH.
Shocking, right? The shitty influencers didn't want this info getting out...
Anyway, the first thing you want to do is get a bitcoin wallet. A Bitcoin Wallet is software that helps you secure a bitcoin address by combining advanced cryptographic techniques, a secure password and a mnemonic phrase, a list of human readable words.
This sequence of words, along with the password you make, are the key to accessing the funds in your bitcoin address. Let's take a moment to review some bitcoin wallet- hang on, some instagram influencer is on my yard saying I destroyed his graphics card scalping profits with this tutorial.
I'm back. Anyway, bitcoin wallets.
(Rocky theme plays)
The Wallet Contenders (Computer Circuit)
First off, we have the original Bitcoin Wallet - often called the Satoshi Client for being the first implementation of bitcoin's wallet system. With years of development and an open-source code for anyone to audit, this venerable piece of software is for those power users who want to get right into the most secure option when it comes to utilizing bitcoin.
Be advised that it downloads the full bitcoin blockchain onto your local system to ensure that no one can intercept your transactions - weighting in at a hefty 500+Gb download and around 5~10Gb per month, but you can enable blockchain pruning to keep the download at a fraction (around 10Gb) while sacrificing little to no security.
Make sure you've got enough space and bandwidth to spare.
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Secondly, we have a newer MIT-license wallet named Electrum. A lot more lightweight option for people who don't have beefy storage and bandwidth to spare, this wallet uses third-party blockchains to verify your transactions. As you can tell, not having to download the blockchain makes it easier for first-timers to dabble in bitcoin without having to worry about bandwidth and storage space.
Just so you know, that third-party blockchain records can go down (as is with many things on the internet), but for absolute beginners just learning how to use bitcoin, Electrum is an excellent choice for learning how to make transactions, receiving tips and when you're ready for the big leagues, you can export your wallet for use with any other bitcoin wallet software.
There's some more advanced bitcoin wallets out there - but this is a basic tutorial. You came here for a basic understanding, not for a technical lecture.... right?
The Wallet Contenders (Mobile Circuit)
If you're using a smartphone, you obviously can't use software that's built for computers. Smartphone software developers have made some good-lookin' wallets as well. Since I don't actually have a smartphone, all I can do is provide you with some links to android and iphone app pages. It goes without saying, but please read through the reviews posted before using any software here.
Remember the mnemonic phrase I mentioned earlier? It's part of an encryption process to introduce complexity and randomness into the process of obfusicating your private keys. Like having a long password rather than a short phrase of alphanumerics. Y'know, like
It's time for the moment you've been waiting for! Things are different for each software, but for the sake of this tutorial, we'll be walking through Electrum for the desktop. For the purposes of this tutorial, we'll start with the first option - a simple wallet.
2FA wallets and multi-sig wallets are for extra security and multiple signatures (think joint accounts) respectively.
As you progress, you'll be prompted to take note of your mnemonic phrase and password.
An example of a mnemonic seed on Electrum:
NOTE: 12 words is the minimum, but I recommend 24 word based mnemonic phrases for maximum security. In Electrum, you should be able to generate extra words by clicking Options over there.
Illustration: Options for wallet generation (this is on one of those advanced wallets I mentioned, but you get the idea).
Your wallet software will then give you the option of creating a password.
Along with the Mnemonic Phrase, this password is one of two keys to secure your new bitcoin address. Follow password security standards to make an excellent password, then write down the Mnemonic phrases in the order that they were generated in, along with your password...
...like this.
WORD1
WORD2
WORD3
And so on
It is important for the Mnemonic Phrase to be written exactly as it is generated. Losing these word sequences is the number one reason why people lose access to their cryptocurrency wallet.
At any point, if you're asked to select between TESTNET and MAINNET, pick MAINNET.
Testnet is a separate blockchain where beta features on the Satoshi client (and some other wallets) were tested with bitcoin that does not exist. This can also be useful to a complete newbie who wants to try their hand at practice transactions without risking real bitcoin. Think of Testnet as the expired credit cards you give to the li'l kid next door who wants them because the cards look cool.
The wallet software will handle encryption tasks and you'll have a nice bitcoin address. If your wallet needs to do any more syncing with the blockchain, let it do the work while you go and stash the mnemonic phrase and password somewhere safe. Preferably in a safe. Like it was a land deed to the Flying Dutchman's Lost Gold mine.
Example BTC address:
1Befii32Bq5AYRh6KmkRQ3zH7U6hm3DiVx
Now, just because your mnemonic phrase and password is NOT anywhere online/digital doesn't mean you're safe from getting hit yet. There's one last concept you need to understand before you post your bitcoin address and start accepting payments - one that came into existence quite recently.
Personal Safety
Bitcoin, due to how it's built, allows anyone to see how much money is on any address at any time. If the account you post your bitcoin address has any kind of personally identifiable info (your mug, home address, drivers license - etc), your bitcoin address can be tied directly to you, and lowlifes and other scumbags looking for a quick payout might try to jump you.
So before you post your freshly-baked bitcoin address, make sure you have followed Ye Olde Internets Safety Standard found in any children's IT books from the late 90s to the early 2000s - no real names, no face reveals, don't give your ID and/or phone number to strangers on the internet.
All that good stuff.
The world's yer oyster!
Now for the good stuff! You can earn and spend bitcoins without worrying about what Collective Shart, Poopypal and Wussa thinks of your works.
People sending you BTC can add in a description in the transaction, for example, if they're paying for a commission, they can add "payment for super 3D adventure guy art commission". You can review all incoming transmissions and coordinate with your clients to make sure you're collecting what needs to be collected.
Here's a good tip when you're accepting payments in BTC - offer a discount! For example, if you're commissioning a 5$ art piece, accept 4.50US$ in BTC.
So... what's with the fees?
Oh yeah, fees are a thing. The 'cost' to write to thousands of bitcoin ledgers distributed around the world.
Fees in proper wallets should be less than a 1/10000th of the total transaction amount, charged in Satoshis (think cents for bitcoin). The less fees you pay, the slower your transactions go through. Me, I keep mine on the lowest possible rate because my inner circle of TRUE NAKAMA don't mind a slow transaction. It helps keep fees low, too.
Any proper wallet should have the means to alter the fee rate.
Here's Bitcoin Core's take on it.
Fees fluctuate depending on how much writing the blockchain is going through, so a delay of 8 hours is no problem for me. Make sure to keep those fees low to help you save money!
Summary
Step 1: Get a bitcoin wallet software for your device.
Step 2: Make sure your system and bandwidth can handle what you're using.
Step 3: When in doubt, use lightweight systems.
Step 4: Generate the bitcoin address and stash the mnemonic phrase and any password like you've got a land deed to a stretch of mountainous terrain with pure gold veins running through the rock.
Step 5: Before posting your bitcoin address anywhere, make sure you don't have any personal info linked to whatever account you post it from.
Step 6: SKEWER THE WINGED B-uh I mean... All done!
BONUS: A list of scams and what to expect from them.
Rug Pull: Scammers artificially inflate the price of a shitcoin (one they probably made) by spreading false or misleading information. They convince victims to swap their Bitcoin with the worthless shitcoins as a 'trade', then sell their holdings and runs off with the money. This tactic is often used by 'tech bros' to swindle their targets. Remember the $HAWK disaster? Classic rug pull.
Moral of the story: What you have is valuable. Don't throw it away for supposed 'profits'!.
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Pyramid schemes: This scam relies on recruiting new members to generate profits. Each new member is required to make an "investment", and a portion of this investment is used to pay returns to earlier members. The scheme collapses when there are not enough new members to sustain the payments. The ancient egyptians should sue these "influencers" pulling that kind of scam.
Moral of the story: If someone pitches a 'buy shares to join a profitable BTC venture!!' offer at you - RUN!
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Social Engineering: This dirty trick involves manipulating individuals into divulging the mnemonic phrase and password. Scammers often pose as customer support representatives, tech experts, law enforcement and so on and steal their bitcoin once their mark cracks under pressure. This usually happens to people whose bitcoin address has been tied to their real identity, but random 'dragnet' attacks have also been reported.
Moral of the story: Record all scammers and push them until they start screaming into the mic. This helps stabilize the planet's magnetic field (source: trust me bro).
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Fake Bitcoin Wallets: Scammers create fake bitcoin wallets that appear legitimate but are designed to steal the user's private keys or funds. These wallets are promoted through phishing emails, google play store/apple app store, social media or fake websites. Once the user enters their private key or transfers funds, the scammers gain control of the bitcoin. Or in some cases, suddenly charge huge fees to drain your BTC wallet while you least suspect it.
Moral of the story: Check the URL of the website you're on. Fakes can be spotted with a little inspection. Also, use the original developer's site to download your software! Also, use SHA-256 verification to make sure you have an untampered program!
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Testnet Scam: This dirty trick involves edited photos / a large sum of testnet BTC deposited into a testnet wallet made to look like a real wallet containing an eye-catching amount of BTC. In the real world, testnet BTC isn't really worth anything because faucet services readily provide testnet BTC to developers and hobbyists. The falsified wallet's Mnemonic Phrase and password is offered for sale at a 'reasonable amount' of real BTC, with the customer 'paying' for the right to make a large amount of money... that doesn't really exist.
Moral of the story: If someone offers such a deal to you, ask for and look up the BTC address with a blockchain explorer! Or better yet, demand to see uncropped photos of said wallet. This alone causes the entire scam to implode!
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BONUS: FAQ
Q: What is a seed phrase?
A: The British version of the mnemonic phrase.
Q: Do you use bitcoin?
A: Around 10% of my cryptocurrency portfolio is bitcoin.
Just learned that a man I looked up to since early childhood died today. It's like a nightmare, but there's no waking up from reality.
Also known as "Hulk Hogan", the wrestling icon was a regular fixture growing up, an inspiration to several generations of wrestling fans, people who wanted to be wrestlers and so much more. He was a lighthouse tower in the distance, a beacon and a role model for three consecutive generations. In my youth, kids in grade school would do weight training at "Hulk Hogan's Gym" (a makeshift building made with cardboard panels and abandoned wooden planks) and put together rags to do his signature shirt-ripping pose before engaging in wrestlemania mini LIVE since most of us couldn't afford cable TV back in the mid-90s.
In fact, the VHS tapes of his shows (both real and animated) were traded with what we imagined to be the same sort of security and reverence conferred to bank bullion transports.
As we grew older, we watched on bigger and better screens as he aged - yet the fire in him refused to die. Through the 2000s, Terry continued his legend, and his unwavering popularity simply grew.
His splendid deeds and storied legend were seen as something to exploit by cowardly "journalists" who ran hitpieces and smear campaigns for the sake of rageclick income. Terry didn't apologize. He didn't kneel to these limp-wristed fuckwads who delighted in picking on those who they deemed 'easy targets'. Hulk Hogan was old, but he did not go soft. The conflict escalated until Hulk Hogan delivered a Lawsuit of the Running Leg Drop on Gawker in court, bankrupting the cabal of corrupt corpo-journos and walking into the halls of living legends.
Things changed for him in the mid 2020s as old age finally began to affect him - but even then, he exuded an inner strength that, for a time even felt like it kept aging at bay. Right to the end, he truly lived his life accomplishing greatness with every year and leaving behind a legacy of hope, dreams and American badassery.
Rest easy, brother. You'll be doing those Axe Bombers in the Big Ring in the sky now.
I grieve, but only for a moment. There is much to do, after all...
Well, I guess I'm 40 years old. 20 years ago I didn't even expect to take this detour. Started out on RPGMaker 2000 wanting to be a big time game dev while pretty much barely living, then along came FLASH MX 2004 and 20 years later I find myself knee deep in the world of international business and actually making enough moolah to actually enjoy game dev as a hobby without having to do POPULAR THING (Thanks Wegra!). And just so you know, I'm not gonna stop, even if I hit 80.
Just goes on to say crazy shit happens in life and it's absolutely unpredictable.
BUT WAIT! AS OF WRITING THIS NEWSPOAST, I'M LEVEL 39 ON NEWGROUNDS! SO I'M NOT ACTUALLY AT LEVEL 40 OF REAL LIFE YET! AHAHAHAHAHA YES, TAKE THAT MIDLIFE CRISIS! YOU AINT GETTING ME YET! [Lie 0%]
Narrator: Denial is the first stage of grief.
Onto more interesting news, take a look at the work in progress of the next game project!
IT'S EVERYWHERE.
From jumbled lines and rambling notes on a sketchbook to somewhat-complete game, this project has survived the horrors of real life and a lot of project juggling when I had to deal with that 2024 loan deadline, and now that summer vacation is here, I hope to finish it just in time for the 21st anniversary of this crazy game series.
So far, half the storyline events are done, with 2/3rds of the side material finished. Thanks to everyone who contributed trivia, event ideas and most of all, the PINGAS LAZOR! You know who you are!
I don't really have a name for it YET, but it's a direct sequel from the events of Sex Kitten 10. Don't worry, I'll achieve the Ballmer Peak and figure something out right at the end.
I should buy it a beer, damn.
HINT: Never tell a nature goddess that you are directly responsible for a global wildfire.
Just putting that out there.
What other stuff is new? Well, I recently rediscovered an old hobby of mine earlier this month...
I had a blast playing though one of my favorite pokemon games in the series after all this time. Feels great to really sit back down, relax and play some peak quality videogames without the worry of a "HEY MAN SOMETHING BAD HAPPENED AT WORK, WE NEED YOU NOW! WHAT, NO VEHICLE?! USE INSTANT TRANSMISSION!" call. Rebuilding the ol' Join Avenue to match the power level on my old DS cart was fun - more so with the power of the INTERNET (Real guests instead of NPCs)!
A much-needed vacation. Funny story, I slept through most the first days of summer vacation, I guess I have sleep debts to pay [HORROR STING].
And since this summer vacation is 100% paid, I'm gonna put a video of one of the best non nons say Summer Vacation. WOOOOOO!
Later this summer, I'm taking a short course in improved web design. Notepad and HTML is cool and all, but single brick webpages shouldn't be the end all-be all of my website design portfolio. Oldschool geocities pages did so much more and I'm eager to learn how. Can't stay a rookie forever, ya know.
There's some other stuff I'm working on:
Much to my surprise, Renpy's evolved a lot during the last few years and I've decided to start a short kinetic novel for the fun of it. It's definitely a lot easier to use than the good ol' bad ol' days (insert BACK IN MY DAY meme here) when there was no debug message aside from a crash to DOS LOL. I admit that I'm still a beginner when it comes to that platform, so might as well start with something simple, right?
Also, I'm doing some scenario writing work for a friend of ours working on a TTRPG (that's tabletop RPG in nerd talk). Fun little exercise to be sure, but it's always nice to find new hobbies and things to do. I'll never get bored at this rate BWAHAHAHAHAAHAHA!
... maybe I should resurrect some of those book projects again, now that I have SUPER SAND LEGEND free time. Maybe.
I'm gonna be working on game dev some more, but before I sign off, here's a thank you for all the birthday greetings and presents you awesome people have sent me thus far. Thank you all!
THATS RIGHT YOU ALL GET A BONUS PREVIEW: New, improved ZEEKY SECURITY SAFE! Get the code wrong 3 times, and BOOOOOM goes your FAIC!
Or, as I've recently learned to say it in Japanese... 明けましておめでとうございます!
So far so good, no nukes flying around haphazardly, bringing down the sky and all. Somehow, we all survived 2024 lolololol. And hey, watching the first sunrise of the new year's put some Motiva++ in my veins. Right to the meat of things, then - a lot of people have asked me why I wasn't too active on the internet in 2024, and now that I'm done with it, I can explain why.
31st December 2024 was the payment deadline for a bank loan I had taken out. Much of my online life, R&D, internet expeditions, game development and otherwise having fun doing stuff was heavily dialed back because I had to do freelance work and commissions on top of my real life job to earn every coin I could to make sure I could hit the deadline. I wasn't sure if I should mention this before since I wasn't sure if I could actually make it - but damn, I somehow pulled it off. Selecting a shorter deadline is a risky route to take, but it reduces interest payments, that's why I did it.
SAFETY NOT GUARANTEED, I HAVE DONE THIS ONLY ONCE BEFORE, WOULD NOT RECOMMEND.
The mortgage is next, but compared to the bank loan cutting so close, I can manage to pay this off WITHOUT compromising on what really matters.
But you know, it wasn't all bad/doom/gloom - despite the rush of work, I learned a lot of new things, new compression methods, new programming tricks, new drawing methods during that headlong rush to make the target goal. Now that I'm done, I'm going to use everything I've learned to make even better games and art moving forwards.
WE NEED TO GO WIDER.
I would also like to take this moment to thank the absolute kings over at the Newgrounds Reading Challenge for pushing me to read books that also served as a supplementary education for game development, business and doing things my own way. Of the books I read this year, these three books are my recommendation for anyone walking the path of game developer.
Game Design: What Makes a Development Team?
Game Developer’s Market Guide by Bob Bates and others
How to Start Your Business and Make it Work, DK Books (multiple authors and editors).
Making free games is fine too, but the reason why I added the business book is because it provides an excellent insight into how one should market and distribute the finished products. It's for this reason that I hope that the Newgrounds Reading Challenge continues on for many more years to come.
Also, guess what's 100% ruffle compatible?!?
One of the more complex games I made is now pretty much 100% forklif-UHHH I MEAN ruffle certified. It was a bit of work having to recode and redo some broken segments, but now everyone can enjoy this piece of newgrounds forum history as it was meant to be played.
Ya know, I should make more games like this. Might have to do some R&D on save files some more in a post-swf world...
Next up: Progress on the next sex kitten game! (the green lines indicate areas of the game coded to be playable thus far).
Once it reaches all-in, adding in game events will begin. As per my standard working procedure, the first event (game intro) is already done. The GUI system is also functional, with some snazzy new gameplay features that depend on real time! Things didn't go quite as planned last year, but with the bank job finally done, I'm confident that this game will be done just in time for the 21st anniversary of the Sex Kitten series!
I've got some other projects on the backburner for now, but for the time being, this is getting my full attention.
2025 brings financial freedom, but with it - new challenges and more stuff to do. And hey, it's never a boring ride. Yes, it started with a WTF and it might be tougher than 2024... but you know what I gotta say to that?
What a metric fuckton of BS. Why, back in my day people could make any kind of games and these fragile turds weren't even a thing.
Of course, its one of these nameless "acquisitions" that send quality control down the crapper.
inb4 mass lawlsuit due to lost revenues.
On the bright side, someone from there commissioned a game dev project from me regarding this mess, which is nice. Just waiting on request details now.
This has been the best day of 2024 as far as I'm concerned. First, foremost - for all you fans of lostwave, you'll instantly recognize what I'm going on about when I say
THE MOST MYSTERIOUS SONG ON THE INTERNET.
HAS BEEN IDENTIFIED.
You heard me right! What has been considered as a mistitled song by some, others claiming that the song was proof that parallel universes existed, has finally been identified after what feels like years of quiet sleuthing from fans around the world.
AND WE HAVE A TITLE FOR IT.
"Subways of your mind", was recorded by a little-known 1980s German band called FEX, along with two other songs
Heart in Danger and Talking Hands - songs that feel like a 'well done' from the band for the discovery of the song.
The band had been oblivious to the online phenomenon this entire time. AND YES, THE BAND MEMBERS STILL SURVIVES TO THIS VERY DAY.
When the track first entered public consciousness, the community's approximated name and time of the music track did not show up in any music databases, and the audio quality meant that the lyrics seemed to shift with every listening. Undaunted, online sleuths tried to work out what instruments could be heard and analyzed the lead singer's accent. These first attempts to identify the song, soon classified by many as being in the 1980s' "New Wave" genre, yielded little.
It could have been 1970s music. Some even called it a prank. No one knew.
Well, until now.
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!
That's right - the band is planning a reunion in light of this information. Man, this feels like how I felt when Ohashi Junko found out about the massive surge of popularity for her music at the twilight years of her life. I am glad to be alive to have witnessed this moment.
I thought things wouldn't get any better. Much to my surprise, things did get better.
Donald J. Trump won the election against what looked like a Stalinist "show me the man, I'll show you the crime" judiciary, running against a crooked cop with a history of jailing innocent people to supply cheap labor. A right-proper velvet revolution. And for the first time in four years it feels like this nonstop trauma chain of hyperinflation, censorship, forever wars and the global economic crisis domino reactions is coming to an end.
For a moment, I just sat back as people around the world celebrated the defeat of the party of warfare, the party of forever wars, the party of cruelty and disregard was defeated by the ballot box. I watched, overawed at how out-of-touch, self-appointed "elites" in their digital ivory towers screamed at who they deemed their 'vassals' for the "crime" of not doing as they ordered. They once sneered down upon anyone who disagreed with them and silenced any sort of open discussion. Now they were demanding why they were not being taken seriously.
How could anyone take them seriously when their sole response to any kind of disagreement or questioning was to scream "everyone I dont like is a nazi!"? Funny thing is: after calling everyone to the right of Pol Pot a nazi, then they complained about the 'nazis everywhere'.
They wanted compliance or bust - so convinced that they were on the right side of history. I watched as they now screamed and threatened to harm those who would not toe the line, and as the night continued - start thrashing and screaming in a fit of anger over not getting what they wanted. Some of these people were these condescending, abusive scumbags who thought that silencing anyone who disagreed with them somehow made them a good person.
It did not. It left them in a misguided echo chamber that cut them off from reality. For a while, it was really nice to see myself get vindicated after all these years. They were so angry with me for having opinions they disagreed with, they denied it all so vociferously is now accepted today as cold, scientific facts. I'd be lying if I didn't say I had a bit of lulz at the impotent rage of these petty tyrants.
As I watched the numbers roll in, they began to lash out at innocents. Legal immigrants somehow got blamed by these petulant, alleged "adults" for choosing to protect themselves. Women were called "race traitors" for picking what they deemed was the side who listened to their voices. Men were called 'subhumans' for trying to find a way out of crushing hyperinflation and trying to put food on the table for their families. It was a purity spiral through and through. They might not have known it, but the dehumanizing rhetoric of these zealots is exactly why the democrat party lost.
The ugly truth is that the democrat party abandoned the working class.
What these angry people were doing by screaming "nazi" or "fascist" at anyone who dared disagree with them or go against what was effectively state media's dictate was not just driving away moderates from the democratic party vote. No wonder - the complete termination of dialogue meant that no problems would be discussed or even solved - what the far left were doing was making actual fascists and national socialists look like reasonable people compared to them. These self-appointed commissars who wanted you beaten up, ostracized, put in camps or even exterminated because you dared to speak out against corrupt corporations and government overreach are making absolute fools of themselves.
A few of those now "melting down" on social media were just frightened, reduced to hatred because that's what they were taught - not knowing any better. And they deserve an out - no one deserves to live in fear, trapped by the cruel lies of a social media web.
Leave them be. Smile, if you must. The election is over, but the real war begins now.
Censorship from powerful international organizations is rife as ever, with libraries coming under cyberattack and powerful publishing companies threatening the Internet Archive for the "crime" of keeping knowledge open. Even now, a corrupt United Nations harasses digital artists in pursuit of imagined "obscenities" against pixels and lines on paper rather than try to help resolve humanitarian situations in Africa and the Middle East. Ignorant government officials are on the warpath against small businesses. Corporate crime and human trafficking is the norm, rather than things that should have been eradicated as the world entered a more civilized age, and the nuclear clock stands the closest it has been to marking the beginning of nuclear war.
Doing something, no matter how little to pull the world back from this collective chaos does seem like an impossible task - but then I'm reminded of those sleuths searching for what once was lost media. It might have seemed pointless at times, especially when leads ran dry over the years - but driven by their own passion and resolve, they kept searching.
And they succeeded.
And hey, if old man Trump won against the full might of the corporate media machine backing the democrat party, then it's reasonable to believe that everyone around the world, can work together to pull back our very existence from the brink by setting aside this artificial hatred for one another.
Won't be easy, but nothing worth having ever is. And a world without censorship, without exploitation and without war is absolutely worth working for, no matter how tough things get.
... and now for the bad news. I think I fucked up my schedule and IRL decided to troll me by giving me promotions.
(fucks sake I can't believe I fucked up the schedule and overshot by a week)
20 years and one week(maybe, I think, sorta) ago, the first forkheads crew released this wild piece of gaming history that would change the world forever.
lol jk it was just random stupid fun. Despite the simple idea, the lolsorandom story did set off what I think is one of the most long-lasting eroge series on newgrounds. It was made in a time when animesque 'sim date' series were taking their first steps and the first sex kitten game's stupid, yet memorable dialog, a-to-b plotline and the ease playing through this game gave generations of newgrounders the first glimpse into the world of chaotic stupid that would be the signature of this series to this very day.
And it would inspire this idiot to start learning the secrets of Flash.
And whooeeey what a mess that was! I did not stop even when Adobe retired the flash player system as a whole.
NEVER GONNA STOP, and in the immortal words of Hanzo... NEVERNEVERNEVERNEVERNERVERI'LLEATYOUREYESOCKETS.
also OCTOFUCKER POTATO CANNON
Despite the fact the series is just one year off from buying beers, it's still fondly remembered, and this scene:
... I want to poke that thing in the cheek but I know she'll probably maul me with a sledgehammer AND a chainsaw.
My sides are probably orbiting the Small Magellan Cloud after hearing her voice rendition.
... or does she sound EVEN MORE SUPA-HYPED UP? That's INSANE!
Speaking of Insanity, it's come to my attention that the Sex Kitten: Insanity! game is no longer available on newgrounds. It's unfortunate that the original forkheads crew didn't give me the *.fla for this project, so I can't really change the audio or anything to fix that.
So, for now, I recommend using this wayback machine link as an alternative. Not to worry, they've got ruffle too.
-
So, what's next on our legendary idiot hero's journey? Did his life go out in a blaze of glory after the events of Sex Kitten 10?
Nah.
Sure, 2023 didn't get a game release but blame that on my IRL; after many years of the average office worker's life, I finally managed to swim up the corporate stream and into the Director Zone. No, no, not the
GREAT DIRECTOR WATANABE
sorta director, more of an assistant director who actually has to do all the directing while the Director has to deal with things like the recent PR fallout due to the CrowdStrike cyberFUBAR. It's a pretty nice job, but given that there's a lot of work to do... well, my free time kinda took a nosedive LOL.
So yeah, that PRRRRRRRRRROMOTIONS meant a lot of work while the company finally made it back to pre Corona-chan world tour 2020 at the end of 2023. With all that hard work outta the way, I've started working on the next stupid Sex Kitten adventure. Sex Kitten 10 ended on a cliffhanger, and things stayed that way for a bit, but no more!
Look forward to playing this fiery mess this summer or the Australian summer of 2024 (if I somehow fuck up my schedule and workflows yet again)!.
